My name is Nobody, and I do not want you to like me.
I come to resist love—perhaps as a mirror of your own refusal. You lift me, set the measure high, yet cannot fathom my willingness to bind myself—for you, for me. Though we are strangers, my wrists carry the colors of sacrifice. There is no descent, no falling into the hole you imagine. Permit me this.
I speak my prayers like a patient waiting to be named. Time belongs to you; sacrifice is my native tongue. The falsehoods you keep will one day become confessions in the dark. I do not fear deception. I welcome risk. No pretense. No concealment. I endure until decay finds its place—moving through shadow, wearing sunset like a bruise, rising only to meet your demands. One desire lives in me: escape from endless tasks, the bed where I am bound and unmoving beneath your hands. Do you regret discovering me? Do you understand what I offer?
Each day I imagine a field of yellow flowers with you. You remain an enigma—known only in the refuge of my mind, a breath of quiet. When belief falters, so does return. The sky darkens. Voices call out. Rest draws near. All I ask is to lay my soul at your feet, to scatter the past and breathe again. Dance with me under moonlight. See yourself reflected in my eyes. I will not ask anymore. I will kneel. I will endure the pain that teaches me I am alive. Be free of me. Strip me to bone. Draw me out from myself. I dream of floating, of meeting you like seeds carried by the wind. Let us discover where we fall.
In denial, I hide my wish to live for you, uncertain if you would meet me there. I make a prayer out of pain. Burdens gather. Blame finds a home. Do not believe in the possibility of loving me. My pride guards me from the unrest in your mind. Are we drawn toward conflict?
Lay me down, then, for I know your harder truth. You know you are not alone and resent the mercy of it—to know where flowers grow by asking, and to keep your contempt for me. I cradle your hatred. I let you wound me. Please, wound me. In pursuit of salvation—however distant—I could walk away, yet I run toward you.
Only one act remains:
take it. test me.
offer my flowerless heart to endure.
to suffer with you.
without you.
Love,
Nobody